JSYK44: A Reaction

What do you do when someone throws up on you?

No really, if you can think about it for just a second, what would be your reaction? I mean, the obvious thing would be to jump back from the person for the fear of it happening again or trying pointlessly to back away from the stuff that’s already soaking into your clothes. Of course, you’d probably experience a little bit of shock. I mean, it’s not every day that someone pukes all over your Wednesday jeans and your t-shirt that’s been washed a couple times too many. After your brain remembered to think again, you’d probably assess the damage to yourself. Did it get on your shoes? Did it get in your hair? How bad are you going to smell for the next week, and for the love of all that is good, PLEASE say it didn’t get on the math homework you’ve been working on for the past hour. Now that you know how bad it is (and it’s pretty bad), it’s time to confront the one from whence the chunks were blown. You’ve got a couple of options here. You can stare at them with your mouth gaping (which may or may not be a good idea depending on the splash radius…), or you could yell and freak out because THESE ARE ALMOST MY BEST JEANS AND THERE’S NO WAY I’M DOING THIS HOMEWORK AGAIN AND WHY DIDN’T YOU POINT YOUR BIG MOUTH SOMEWHERE ELSE? Then again, you might just mumble something about yourfinedon’tworryaboutit as you walk awkwardly away to try and rid yourself of the person’s juiced lunch. You might do this because, after jumping and being shocked and examining yourself, you looked up at the poor, sick person who you hadn’t even noticed was feeling terrible that day and you see in their eyes now exactly how rotten they’re feeling and how awkward and tired of dealing with it they are and a part of you wants to help them feel better while the rest of you can’t bear another whiff of the day’s ham sandwich. If you see them again that day, you might give them some room to avoid a repeat incident or you might be brave and ask the person if they’re doing ok, but the one thing you’re always going to do is wash it all off. It might take a few minutes with some warm water, or it might take a week of long showers, but you’ll get it all out eventually. You’ll wash it away as if it’s very presence on your skin could make you just as sick as the poor soul who happened to cross paths with you. You’ll probably try to never even think about it and, eventually, the little bit of spew awareness you acquired withers away and you miss more sick faces, more sad eyes, and more people who just wanted to talk. Very rarely does all this make you passionate for finding a cure for the common stomach bug.